Yesterday, I MATRICULATED to the LI-BERRY
I had an interesting convo with a fellow sista resident the other day. It turns out that we are both dating men who are less educated than we are. Not coincidentally we are both committed to dating within the race in an area that does not accommodate our preference (i.e., more brothers dating/marrying interracially than not).
My friend's man wants to marry her, but she is held back by the class thing. Brotherman is not a college graduate, and he knows nothing of her Jack and Jill world. Furthermore, he fathered a child out of wedlock which some middle-class black folks still find less than ideal. And his baby mama is GHETTO. But the real kicker for my friend is his bad grammar. He says "you and I" when he should say "you and me" and he leaves the first "r" out of "library". For whatever reason this drives her bonkers. She says she just can't see herself waking up every morning with someone who says "LI-BERRY".
My sweetheart has some issues as well. He keeps misusing the words "matriculate" and "magnanimous". Example: "I matriculated across the room". And anything good is "magnanimous". This is like nails on a chalkboard for me. My constant prayer is that he refrain from using these words around my friends. My friend's approach is to constantly correct her man which irritates them both. He chooses not to change his language. My gut tells me not to even broach the subject with my guy. At least not yet.
And then, there is the issue of dealing with the male ego as female doctor. Part of the reason these men are attracted to us is because we are doctors. But it feels weird for us to be giving orders all day and come home to someone who is too stubborn or too insecure to accept even the smallest correction. It's like living a double life. I wonder if these men would be as defensive with us if they felt better about their own accomplishments.
I'll end here. I have to matriculate to work.
My friend's man wants to marry her, but she is held back by the class thing. Brotherman is not a college graduate, and he knows nothing of her Jack and Jill world. Furthermore, he fathered a child out of wedlock which some middle-class black folks still find less than ideal. And his baby mama is GHETTO. But the real kicker for my friend is his bad grammar. He says "you and I" when he should say "you and me" and he leaves the first "r" out of "library". For whatever reason this drives her bonkers. She says she just can't see herself waking up every morning with someone who says "LI-BERRY".
My sweetheart has some issues as well. He keeps misusing the words "matriculate" and "magnanimous". Example: "I matriculated across the room". And anything good is "magnanimous". This is like nails on a chalkboard for me. My constant prayer is that he refrain from using these words around my friends. My friend's approach is to constantly correct her man which irritates them both. He chooses not to change his language. My gut tells me not to even broach the subject with my guy. At least not yet.
And then, there is the issue of dealing with the male ego as female doctor. Part of the reason these men are attracted to us is because we are doctors. But it feels weird for us to be giving orders all day and come home to someone who is too stubborn or too insecure to accept even the smallest correction. It's like living a double life. I wonder if these men would be as defensive with us if they felt better about their own accomplishments.
I'll end here. I have to matriculate to work.
posted by babydoc @ 6:30 PM
2 comments
